Dementia: Looking Back: Looking Ahead (Week 24)

Carers Assessment Needed

Maureen’s presentation continues to become increasingly challenging. She is now very distressed if I am out of sight; often believing that she has been locked in the house and left alone.  On occasions she will forget where I am and leave the house in a bid to find me. She has been extremely tired in the last few days and spends a lot of her time sleeping on the sofa.  Tests results should be back today and reveal if an infection is making life even more challenging for her.

I had given up trying to persuade Maureen to move from the sofa to the bedroom at night.   After last night’s performance I doubt I will try to move her again. When she is sleeping on the sofa the Baby Monitor usually wakes me well after midnight and with luck I manage to encourage her to join me in the marital bed.  However when my deep sleep is interrupted I find it difficult to nod off again and exhaustion follows.

Maureen is really struggling to know how to pass time; she has no hobbies and restricts her activities to minor household duties.  She can no longer read and gets little enjoyment from watching T V.  On some days she will respond well to my performance as a DJ and spend a considerable amount of time singing along to her favourite music.

Despite the warmer weather it is not easy to persuade Maureen to take exercise.  She often complains that her leg hurts, she has no suitable clothing or is simply too tired to go out.

 A Carers Assessment is needed to take account of changes in Maureen’s presentation and Luton have helpfully summarised the key issues:

About Remember Me

I am a retired adult educator. My wife had a stroke in February 2014 and now has mixed dementia. Her recovery from stroke has been exceptional apart from 50% loss of peripheral vision and vascular damage. 'Dharma For Dementia' is my approach to being Maureem's Care Partner: it aims to end the suffering of 'Prescribed Disengagement' (Swaffer) .
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4 Responses to Dementia: Looking Back: Looking Ahead (Week 24)

  1. SEITH, Francesca says:


    I thought you might be interested to know about some of the people following your posts.

    As you can see I am in Australia working for the Commonwealth Government in the Dementia Policy area. I found out about your posts via Kate Swaffers blogs.

    I am relatively new to this particular area, so I am finding your posts very helpful and informative, although I have been involved in carers policy in government.

    The personal perspective provides very nuanced and valuable information and I appreciate it very much.

    Many thanks

    Francesca Seith
    Assistant Director | Dementia Policy Section
    Ageing and Sector Support Branch (ASSB) | Department of Health
    • (02) 6146 6289
    Level 5, Sirius Building|GPO Box 9848, Canberra ACT 2601
    I acknowledge the traditional custodians of the lands and waters where we live and work, and pay my respects to elders past, present and future.


  2. Mary Smith says:

    I remember the nights of broken sleep as dad wandered the house. And even when on a rare night he slept, I didn’t because I was still listening out for him getting up.
    We always knew when dad had an infection – long before tests were done – because of his increased confusion. Things evened out a bit once he was on antibiotics.


  3. Remember Me says:

    Just got the results no infection so this is either a dip or general progression. Just off for a nap to try to catch up on some sleep.


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