Dementia: Looking Back: Looking Ahead (Week 21)

Maureen and I had a lovely day out in Nottingham yesterday.  My suggestion that her brother needed cheering up raised my nurturing wife from her bed and we were on our way by 10 am.  Unfortunately, we had to return home 15 minutes later as I had topped up the car with petrol and left my wallet at home.  I also did my usual trick as we approached our destination and took a wrong turning which delayed our arrival even further.

Dianne, our sister in law, provided a beautiful lunch which eased our introduction to new surroundings.  It didn’t take me long to see that it had been worth an elongated journey on a hot day: brother and sister were soon back in the old routine.

After lunch we walked to a nearby park in beautiful sunshine.  Once again the siblings were chattering away as we made our way around a Vintage Car Show.  I was in my element as I stumbled across an Austin 1800 in mint condition and reminisced with the owner about my days on the shop-floor at British Leyland.

We decided to delay our departure from Nottingham until early evening when it was a little cooler.  Maureen was obviously very tired on the homeward journey but we continued with the banter that we had enjoyed on our way to Nottingham.  She took to the sofa shortly after we arrived home and was asleep almost as soon as she laid her head on a cushion.  Around 10.30 pm I managed to ease her upstairs to sleep alone as she wanted a bed to herself because she was too hot.

Maureen awoke at 1pm very distressed and confused about where she was.  Eventually she joined me in the spare room.  Two hours later she was awake again crying that ‘she was in a madhouse where she didn’t know who was in bed with her and she wanted to go home and be with people she knew in her family’.

At around 6 am we have had a very positive conversation about ‘going home’ and being closer to our loved ones.  Maureen has been a revelation saying ‘let’s not get carried away and rush into anything’.  It is lovely to see my wife firmly in control using her intellect to appraise our situation.  I wouldn’t be at all surprised if she didn’t outwit ‘Mrs Dementia’ one of these days and send her back to where she belongs: it might just be that there is something in ‘The P C Approach To Memory Loss’.



About Remember Me

I am a retired adult educator. My wife had a stroke in February 2014 and now has mixed dementia. Her recovery from stroke has been exceptional apart from 50% loss of peripheral vision and vascular damage. 'Dharma For Dementia' is my approach to being Maureem's Care Partner: it aims to end the suffering of 'Prescribed Disengagement' (Swaffer) .
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2 Responses to Dementia: Looking Back: Looking Ahead (Week 21)

  1. Good Morning Paul. Congratulations the new look is lovely. I hope you enjoyed changing your theme and the work involved. The new look is very engaging


    • Remember Me says:

      Hi Jen nearly time to say good night here. Thanks for your feedback about the new theme. There may be one or two revisions to it in the next few days. I’m very grateful for your help.


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